4 Ways a Dating Coach Will Elevate Your Dating Life
If you're like most other people I work with, you're probably confused and frustrated with the ups and downs of online dating training. You may be wondering, "What's the matter with me?" Why am I experiencing such a difficult time? How can I make dating more enjoyable?
As you dig a little deeper and think about things that could help - a new wardrobe, a new city, a therapist, etc., The thought of hiring a relationship coach may gradually enter your mind, prompting another set of questions: why would I need a dating coach? Does hiring a coach to mean I’m defective in some way? Do dating coaches really even work to get results in dating? What is dating coaching?
These are all critical questions to ask! First, I’ll say to you - you’re not alone: modern dating is designed to prey on our most significant weaknesses, feed our insecurities, and get us addicted to minor hits of connection rather than helping us build safe and trusting relationships. Second, I’ll say - rest assured; I have some solid answers to these questions, as well as a list of ways hiring a dating coach can help you navigate modern dating problems.
So first, the answers to some of the questions above, which I get asked often by clients and people I meet:
What does a dating coach do?
Dating coaches help you get clarity on what you are looking for, attract partners that are a match for you, say “no” to partners or situations that are not a match for you, develop better tools for navigating online dating and in-person dating, and find a partner or otherwise meet your dating goals. They help you manage motivation and online dating burnout and can even help you navigate online practical aspects of dating like profile writing, dating communication, where to meet people, and responding to matches.
Do dating coaches really work?
Dating coaches are effective at helping you meet your dating goals. People who hire coaches and engage with them are more likely to find a partner, enjoy dating, and have positive dating experiences than those who do not have support.
What results can I expect to see from using a dating coach?
The most significant results you can expect to see when working with a dating coach are more alignment between your words and actions and better discernment regarding who you match with and date.
What is mindful dating coaching?
Mindful dating coaching is a process-oriented approach that engages mindfulness ideas like nonjudgment, going slowly, and applying intention and attention to dating. The lack of rules, games and prescriptive formulas distinguishes mindful dating coaching from regular dating coaching. Mindful dating coaching may use frameworks for thinking about dating, such as non-judgmental observation of situations, setting intentions, learning how to respond rather than react, and applying values-based actions.
Now that we have answers to these questions, here are 5 ways a dating coach can help you level up your love life.
1. Develop clarity
A dating coach is great at asking questions and being an objective sounding board. A dating coach will ask incisive and reflective questions, give objective and precise feedback, and give you the tools to think through dating situations differently.
Some clients come to our dating coaches because they don’t even want to date, but they know they want a partner. They aren’t actively ready to date, but they
need to uncover blocks and get clarity about what they need to get back into a dating mindset.
2. Get Inspired
Dating coaches are not only trained to be inspirational and supportive, but they are also aware of the ins and outs of apps, dating books for couples, and videos about dating and relating, as well as events and ideas for ways to meet people. Linking you up with resources and ideas - from Ted Talks to new dating platforms - can be inspirational. They can also help you bounce back when you’re feeling down.
3. Up-level your Online Presence + Profile
a. Friends are biased and have their preferences and ideas about how you should interact online. Dating coaches have a more objective, evidence-based view of what works and what doesn’t work in an online profile and can give you solid tips and feedback about how to make yours more attractive to your ideal mate.
4. Alleviate Dating Related Suffering:
Unfortunately, burnout, trauma, and drama are part of the modern dating
landscape. Dating coaches provide skills, tools, resources, and support to get you through these challenging times. Burned out? A dating coach may help you recognize when to take a break or help you uncover what you need to get back in your dating mindset.
Are you feeling traumatized by someone ghosting or treating you poorly? A dating coach can help you recover and draw upon your inner resources and resilience. In a dramatic situation, a dating coach may be able to help you find your voice and your boundaries or stand up for yourself where you’re feeling scared or like you’d instead just engage in an old pattern like people-pleasing.
5. Support your motivation
Do you ever find yourself ghosting or not responding to a message due to sheer overwhelm and burnout? Probably more times than you’d like to admit if you’re like most online daters. One of the most striking aspects of having a coach or someone in your corner is that they can help you find your intrinsic motivation - internally generating a feeling of wanting to date again.
Frequently Asked Questions:
Q.1 What should I look for in a dating coach?
A. One important piece of advice is to make sure you feel inspired by the coach and trust them. Having confidence and trust in your coach is one of the best predictors of success. It's great to verify their credentials, qualifications, and expertise by checking out testimonials. Ultimately, you want to work with someone that is trustworthy and inspiring. Online dating coaches can be really useful, as you are able to access someone with top-notch training and experience, even if they don't live in your city or state.
Q.2 Why do you need a relationship coach?
A. Relationship coaches help you overcome your difficulties and challenges by holding your highest vision for you beyond your fears and limitations. Relationship coaches assist you in accepting responsibility for the quality of your relationships so that you can build them the way you desire.
Q.3 Can therapy help with dating?
A. Therapy can help you improve your dating and love life by reducing anxiety, identifying and changing underlying thinking and behavioral patterns that contribute to your dating difficulties, and providing you with techniques to reduce discomfort while restoring an overall sense of serenity.